Tom Brady should have a mustache and Planned Parenthood should be defunded

Remember this face

Tom Brady’s suspension is important to me. It’s not about the integrity of the game, though it is a little bit. It’s not about professional honesty, though it is a little of that too. Mostly, it’s because I’m Colts fan and I’ve always hated the Patriots. It’s stupid, but it’s sports.

Defunding Planned Parenthood is also important to me. Not because they are potentially breaking the law by bringing in a profit from the sale of “fetal tissue” (that’s the official complaint), though that would also tick me off. Not because Planned Parenthood screens for Breast Cancer (latest Planned Parenthood marketing angle), since when is Planned Parenthood all about saving women from breast-cancer?  I want Planned Parenthood shoved deep into a bureaucrat’s aluminum file cabinet because Planned Parenthood provides dirty sex-ed classes to teenagers, invites pregnant mothers in for a consultation, persuades these mothers to have their own flesh and blood offspring murdered at the chilly latex-covered hands of a “doctor”, and then sells the tiny body parts of children who were only months away from their first laugh, nearly six months away from cutting their first tooth, and within a year of taking their first step.  Anything that gets between the fetus and that fetus’s first smile, first step, first anything deserves a bleak, painful place in hell.


Let these children smile

The dictionary definition of a fetus is an unborn human baby older than 8 weeks. Even though a human baby is not a fetus prior to 8 weeks, it is still a human baby. Human babies are adorable. Sometimes they look like little apes when they’re born. Some are born looking like Gollum. But you can’t survive the ordeal of being born without a few temporary scars. The wrinkles fade, and the swelling resides. Chubby cheeks, dainty limbs, eyes full of wonder, and a body that can be cradled in one’s palm.  

In the wake of this war of Public Opinion, I wish that all people of good will would ignore this rubbish about the legality of Planned Parenthood’s profits.I also wish the NFL’s suspension of Tom Brady didn’t hinge on the fairness of their procedure. Planned Parenthood is a murderous organization. Tom Brady is a sleazy cheater who should wear a creepy mustache.  There is nothing else to say about either issue.

Everything will one day be as it should be.


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Talking Bodies, Life, and Humans

So, let's talk bodies

So, let’s talk bodies

Tove Lo’s song “Talking Body” has been annoying me on the radio for a short while now, and I’ve decided to do something about it. I’d never heard of the Swedish singer, Tove Lo, before today. I hadn’t heard her single Talking Body till a few months ago. I’ll confess, it’s an incredibly catchy song. Every time it plays on the radio, though, my conscience won’t shut up till I turn the dial. The song’s tune is fun. The song’s message is abhorrent! 

For propriety sake, I’ll limit myself to quoting one line of the song. The others are too lustful, too vulgar for my blog. Maybe not other blogs, but I run a clean, though slightly judgmental blog. However, I will link that one line to the full song–the clean american radio version. Please don’t watch the music video. If you do, it’s on your conscience.

“Bodies. Let’s use them up til every little piece is gone”

You read it right. If we’re going to talk about bodies, Tove Lo is going to talk about them like this, and she does throughout the whole song. I believe we’re all at liberty to hold our own opinions. As a discriminating bigot, I also believe that everyone should be free to speak their mind. Tove Lo has spoken her mind, now I’d like to speak mine.

  • Wrong! Wrong! Very Very Wrong! As if the world didn’t have enough problems amid poverty, pornography, and politics, we are presented with one more dangerous concept. My body is just a toy, or a tool, or a lump of flesh that allows me to experience stuff. The notion is primeval with sin itself, the justification for slavery and prostitution. It had always been these things, but till I heard this song, it never seemed so prevalent.
  • It’s Wrong Because no person should ever be treated as an object. Society almost universally accepts the theory that it is wrong to treat other people as objects. Most people with a conscience object to the porn industry, to human trafficking, and most definitely to slavery. But you know how slavery begins? It begins with the notion that our own body is something to be used, something to be played with, something to be sold. The road to freedom is not the idea that only I can use my body, but instead the idea that no one, not even me, has the right to use my body.
  • Talking Body has spreads the idea that bodies are just objects, property, things to be desired, things to be enjoyed. Objects deserve no dignity. Property is sold for profit. If my body is just a toy, isn’t every body? Answer yes and follow that road to the end. You won’t like where you end up. In a world where bodies are objects, slavery is not a crime. Old school logicians call this reductio ad absurdum. Unfortunately, we do live in a world where bodies are objects, and absurd accepted, not merely tolerated. Until we learn that our bodies are not our own, slavery will never become a thing of the past.
  • Life is a strange thing. We think that its ours. It’s not. That is why we can’t own a body, ours or another’s. Prideful independence is the first domino. It set in motion the harmful tendencies which create our damaged world. My body is not mine to give or mine to take. Our world won’t tolerate that sentence, because it reeks of humility and obedience.
  • Humans are the masters of their own fate, but not of their own life. I challenge any human being to show me proof that life is a gift they decided to give to themselves. We lucked into existence. Being human, having life, having bodies is a responsibility forced upon us. There is no choice. It was never something any of us hoped for or feared. There are two responses to this brutal reality: Gratitude or Denial. Gratitude accepts the duty to care for this gift of life. Denial chooses to ignore the absurdly obvious fact that no man can make himself a body.
  • So if we’re talking bodies, let’s not lie and say that they are ours to do with as we please. Our dramatically complex legal system has already hammered out clear guidelines for ownership. Let’s just say that law favors the landlord. And in legal terms, we are more like renters, or borrowers. We are legal possessors; we are not the owners. There is a big difference. An owner can damage his property without facing charges. When it comes time to return the keys, we will pay for all the damage we have done to ourselves.

Will I listen to the song again? (writer bows hid head and sighs) Just as certainly as I’ll listen to the radio again. The song will play, my conscience will again remind me that the song’s message is perverted. And all of a sudden, the song will serve as a reminder me that my body is not my own to use; it was given to me to take care of.


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Slavery under the Rainbow: Defense of the Confederate Flag

Yeah…I can taste it now.

Rainbows traditionally meant that God would stop flooding people to death. Skittles used to run an ad, encouraging views to “taste the rainbow”. These days, the rainbows is no longer linked to its scientific counterpart, water, and marketing firms will never again encourage clients to taste rainbows. Symbols change over time. What was once a sign of God’s oath, is the standard of the LGBT community. This new symbol was recently validated by the supreme court, and later by the white house. It’s time to dust of the stars and bars and revive an old symbol of traditional american values. 

I don’t mean slavery! I would never propose enslaving gays and lesbians. What good would that do. I can do my own hair, thank you. I mean traditional american values: independence, self-determination, the Fourth of July!

After the confederacy surrendered, the Federal government promptly went to work creating a new class of slaves: ideological slaves, Americans forced into the cultivation of consumerism and a system of selfish morals. There is an ever-growing population of Americans born into a two-party mind-set, bound by the notion that they will either be ruled by a liberal Republican or a conservative Democrat. Government by the people and for the people has perished. All that is left is a government of the people, meaning that the people are the object, not the subject of government.

While some believe that Virginia’s choice to join the confederacy was moved by an evil will to keep slaves, they are wrong. Virginia watched the southern states declare independence. Virginia waited to see how the federal government would deal with these states. And when the rights of states were suppressed beneath the heavy boots of Union soldiers, Virginia hoisted the flag which would eventually become known as the Confederate flag. While it is true that the confederate states maintained slavery during the civil war, it is equally true that the north also maintained slavery. Lincoln’s emancipation proclamation was a measure of war freeing only the slaves in the south. Lincoln, the lawyer, recognized that the current constitution prevented him from imposing the freedom of slaves upon Union states. 

The confederate flag, or more precisely, the flag of the army of northern Virginia, is a symbol of self-determination, of government by the people and for the people, of the spirit of the constitution. As with rainbows, there have been many meanings applied to this symbol. Where symbols are concerned I’m a purest. I look into the sky after a storm and choose to see God’s promise to never again flush humanity out of existence. When I see the Confederate flag I don’t see under-educated white supremacists yearning for the return of slavery. I see the freedom to make my own choices.

It’s ironic that our democratic “pro-choice” federal government, continues to support policies which are decidedly against choice. The freedom to chose implies the ability to chose wrongly as well as to chose rightly. Is it pro-choice to deny states a choice? In the constitution it was clearly outlined that “choice” always fell to the individual states. The Federal Government was essentially denied the ability to make “choices” for the states. Wasn’t that the whole point of the Revolutionary War?

The Federal Government has become a new George III, passing down laws — “choices” — upon an unrepresented people. Unlike George III, who passed laws which were remotely his right to pass, Federal Government has gone into the deeply philosophical business of defining words. Marriage has never, in all the history of the world, ever meant anything other than the union of a man and a woman. Perverse sexual relations, illicit sexual relations, unnatural sexual relations have also been around for quite a long time, and never have they been granted the unique privilege of marriage. It was understood that the sacredness of marriage was intimately bound to the process of procreation. Leave it to the great and liberating 21st century to keep the bathwater, but throw out the baby.

Americans face a dangerous slavery of ideas where we may not be obliged to till the soil and labor under the sun, but where we must work against our conscience and labor under the illusion of freedom. A new flag has recently been raised in our capitol. It is a symbol of oppression and slavery. How the rainbow ever came to mean that, I’ll never understand. America is once again a nation of slavery, slavery under the rainbow.  


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I’m Dad

Father’s Day is nothing at all like Mother’s Day. On Mother’s Day, mothers get their nails done. On Father’s Day, fathers are expected to keep hammering nails. I’m not complaining. This was my first father’s day. I had a blast. My 10 month old son was every 20 odd pounds of a 10 month old. My pregnant wife was exactly what pregnant wives are–what are they? And I was Dad.

Mothers deserve a heck of a lot more pampering on their day than Fathers on their’s. Mothers gave birth, while many fathers sat on the hospital room couch watching football. Mothers have to nurse newborn children every two hours, fathers and their babies fall asleep on rocking chairs. Mothers across the world deserve a day of chocolate ice cream and manicures, and fathers are more than willing to pay for it.

What do dads do anyway? I’ll tell you what we do. We wake up everyday before sunrise and go to work. We commute, some of us great distances, not because we like the drive, but because we want our family living in a good neighborhood. We listen to our boss, or we live with the constant pressure and responsibility of being our own boss. Dads seldom have the freedom to thoroughly pursue their dreams because they are obliged to put dinner on the table and clothes in the washing machine. They dedicate their mind and heart to the happiness of their wives and their children, because nothing matters more to them.

Society often asserts that fatherhood is a responsibility and burden that men should put off for later in life. I’ll tell society now that men don’t have the energy later in life to deal with the responsibilities and burdens of fatherhood. There is nothing more demanding than having to wake up at 4:20 am because the baby is crying, and not be able to go back to sleep because you leave for work at 5:45. Nothing taxes you more than using up all your mental, physical, emotional reserves during the work day, and arriving home to a teething child. That’s fatherhood. It’s beautiful; exhausting, but beautiful.Fatherhood is a divine gift; it makes us like God: Father. It’s also a divine responsibility; it demands that we become like God: Justice, Mercy, and Love.

This morning, I don’t remember why, but I went outside. I was carrying my son. My neighbor wished me a happy father’s day. I wished the same to him. He responded, “But isn’t it worth it.”

When I wake up at 4:20 to get my screaming son, his eyes light up when he sees me. Because I’m Dad.

When I leave for work, my son follows me to the door. He cries once I shut the door, because I’m Dad.

When I get home tired and worn out, my son, diaper sagging to the ground, waddles to the door to wrestle with me because I’m Dad. I’m Dad, and it’s totally worth it.

IMG_20150306_112947420_HDRAlthough it is father’s day, my son is crying, my pregnant wife is being a pregnant wife, and I feel like my soul had been drained from my body…I couldn’t be a happier person. My crying son is well-fed, fully clothed, and pooping with proper constancy and consistency. My pregnant wife craves pickles and whipped cream, so she has them. And I’m Dad.


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G.K. Chesterton, Francis, and Francis: 3 Quotes

G.K. Chesterton, Francis, and Francis: 3 Quotes

Recent controversy over the challenging encyclical of Pope Francis has taken the discussion on the Climate Crisis hostage. I’m not too interested in the Climate Crisis. I save on water and electricity because I also like to save money. I’m not a glutton. There are spheres of influence. The Climate is not a sphere that I influence. However, I recognize that this debate has politicians confused. Presidential candidates thought they had a death grip on the catholic vote. I don’t care much for Presidential candidates because one of them inevitably becomes president and screws up the country. I don’t worry myself about politicians either. CATHOLICS. I care about Catholics. I care about Christians. I care about humans. But I care about Catholics more. And I care about the my Catholic Church very much. That is why I’d like to offer chunks of Chesterton’s wisdom to shed light on the perspective of Pope Francis’s recent encyclical Laudato Sichunks of wisdom from said document, and chunks of wisdom from St Francis himself.

Chesterton wrote a book about St Francis

Three quotes from Chesterton

“St. Francis was a man who did not want to see the wood for the trees. He wanted to see each tree as a separate and almost a sacred thing, being a child of God and therefore a brother or sister of man.”

“Men will not believe because they will not broaden their minds. As a matter of individual belief, I should of course express it by saying they are not sufficiently catholic to be Catholic.”

“Another and quite different stream of spiritual inspiration derives largely from him; all that reforming energy of medieval and modern times that goes to the burden of Deus est Deus Pauperum. His abstract ardor for human beings was in a multitude of just medieval laws against the pride and cruelty of riches; it is to-day behind much that is loosely called Christian Socialist and can more correctly be called Catholic Democrat.”

Pope Francis looks to shape his pontificate after the charismatic life of St Francis

Three quotes from Pope Francis

“A sense of deep communion with the rest of nature cannot be real if our hearts lack tenderness, compassion and concern for our fellow human beings. It is clearly inconsistent to combat trafficking in endangered species while remaining completely indifferent to human trafficking, unconcerned about the poor, or undertaking to destroy another human being deemed unwanted.”

“We are always capable of going out of ourselves towards the other. Unless we do this, other creatures will not be recognized for their true worth; we are unconcerned about caring for things for the sake of others; we fail to set limits on ourselves in order to avoid the suffering of others or the deterioration of our surroundings. Disinterested concern for others, and the rejection of every form of self-centeredness and self-absorption, are essential if we truly wish to care for our brothers and sisters and for the natural environment. These attitudes also attune us to the moral imperative of assessing the impact of our every action and personal decision on the world around us. If we can overcome individualism, we will truly be able to develop a different lifestyle and bring about significant changes in society.”

“In calling to mind the figure of Saint Francis of Assisi, we come to realize that a healthy relationship with creation is one dimension of overall personal conversion, which entails the recognition of our errors, sins, faults and failures, and leads to heartfelt repentance and desire to change.”

Three quotes from St Francis:

“If you have men who will exclude any of God’s creatures from the shelter of compassion and pity, you will have men who will deal likewise with their fellow men.”

“Start by doing what is necessary, then what is possible, and suddenly you are doing the impossible.”

“Sanctify yourself and you will sanctify society.”


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A Little Wisdom from the Little Prince

The was once a little prince from Asteroid B612. He grew tired of his little planet and the companionship of a needy nameless flower. He set out on a journey, visiting other planets in the vicinity. On one planet there was a king
, on another there was a drunk, on yet another there was a man of exceeding vanity. Another planet was inhabited by a man of affairs preoccupied with counting the stars. On each planet lived a specimen accentuating the absurdities of life. But I’d like to draw your attention to a planet with a street lamp, one solitary street lamp.

The little prince visited a small planet with barely enough room for a street lamp and its lamplighter. There were no streets to light, no pedestrians to guide, just a street lamp and its lamplighter.

Upon his arrival the inquisitive little prince wondered why the lamplighter lit the extinguished the lamp even though no one needed its light. To the lamplighter it was plain and simple: it was the law. He was required to light the lamp at dusk and extinguish it at dawn. Because the tiny planet spun about so rapidly, the lamplighter seldom rested. Dusk and dawn were thirty seconds apart. Every minute was a day, every hour was two months. It was the law and the law had to be carried out, no matter how ridiculous it may seem.

The little prince saw in the lamplighter something beautiful and sad. Very much like the king, the drunk, the businessman, and the vain man, the lamplighter belabored himself for nothing. Unlike the king, the drunk, the businessman, and the vain man, the lamplighter created a delicate thing of beauty each night. And a thing of beauty was itself worth something.

The lamplighter was faithful in executing his simple task. From dawn to desk he was hard at it, never wavering in his duty. But he was lazy. He lacked invention. He followed the manual, performed his duties like a robot. The magic of human imagination was lacking.

In the faithful character of the lamplighter we have the plight of America. We are keeping the lamp lit, but the interior fire is sputtering. We are faithful to the law, but the zeal that emboldened our forefathers to confront the British Empire drifts away like the smoke of a dying fire.


Posted by on November 17, 2014 in Off the top of my head


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Free Book!

BookCoverImageGod Does Laugh is up for grabs. Starting next week, God Does Laugh will be offered to Kindle owners for free. Readers with Amazon Prime can purchase the paperback copy at a discounted price. Enjoy refreshing humor, spiritual insight, and profoundly human experiences all at once and for free. The offer begins next Friday, September 19th.


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